Thursday, November 3, 2011

In Defense of Unconventional Love

Let me make a confession. My name is Sophie Oak and I write romance. Yes, there are some of you out there who think that because the sex in my book is a little off the wall and bit kinky that what I write couldn’t possibly be romance, but I’m here to tell you that you’re wrong. 

I might be a little hot under the collar. I, probably like a lot of erotic romance authors, have spent a good deal of time lately either defending my own work or feeling like crap because someone—who hadn’t even read it—told me that what I write is less than romance.

So here’s my answer. Get real. The world is changing and in a good way. These same people who tell me that what I write isn’t romance will also say that male/male books shouldn’t be included in what we call the genre of Romance. Grow up. Love is love. These feelings and emotions that we all write about are universal. It doesn’t matter whether two dicks or one are involved. The heart is the only true compass when it comes to what makes a romance. 

We all have different needs. Acknowledging and coming to terms with those needs are one of the hallmarks of true adulthood. It’s a rite of passage that should be celebrated. And that includes those of us who discover that true freedom is found in accepting a collar or finding that we have more than one soul mate.

The world is changing and it’s hard to be on the cutting edge. I keep telling myself that. Tolerance and love—in all its gloriously freaky forms—are what will see us through the bad times. 

So as you can tell, I’ve had the crap kicked out of me lately. I’ve had my very morals called into question so let me put it plainly. I believe in love. I believe it comes to each of us in different and amazing ways. I believe it is a gift that shouldn’t be turned down because it doesn’t come complete with a white picket fence and two point five kids. 

Thanks for listening to the rant. Love well. Love weird. Love as you will.

13 comments:

REGINA ROSS said...

GREAT POST :)

SusieJ said...

Well said Sophie.
Hugs xx

Tammy said...

Well said Sophie!!!!!!

Riane said...

Whoever tries to tell you that you do not write romance needs to get their head out of their a... rearend.

They are probably those who feel marriage between ANYONE except 1 man and 1 woman threatens their own marriage somehow. **boggle**

Sophie, you are AWESOME and you keep writing the stories that those of us with hearts know are romance through and through.

Kathleen C said...

You tell 'em Sophie! And you cannot listen to these fools as you cannot please everyone. There are so many of us who love and in fact need your erotic, romantic tales of love, friendship, loyalty, and acceptance. So, remember, in one ear and out the other. And don't let it graze your brain (or heart) on its way through.

ashleyd said...

Amen Sophie! People should really think about what is going on in their own lives instead judging others. You write about love in all its forms. Your readers feel love in every word written in your books. I will always be a fan of your books and a fan of love.

bw said...

Sophie,
I taught both of my daughters while they were growing up that finding love was hard enough- why limit it to only one sex or color of skin? Look inside of someone at their heart- that's where someone finds love. They went different directions (kind of) but both found love and happiness- who is to say which is "right"?
beth

Ms. S. Kitty Dreams said...

I find that most of the time, those people aren't worth arguing with. You keep doing what you do. The rest of us will still be here to read about and enjoy the wonderful, romantic worlds you take us to.

June M. said...

Don't you just wanna smack people sometimes? People need to stop worrying about everyone else and putting down what they don't know about. I read a great variety of books (paranormal, historical, sci-fi, mainstream, erotica, m/f, m/m, m/f/m, etc). The one thing they all have in common is romance. If the characters have loving feelings for each other, it is romance. Please stay true to yourself and know that your fans know that your books are romances. Don't let anyone discourage you from sharing your talent with others.

Lily said...

Great post. And yum, some fab pics too.

Lily x

mnjcarter said...

Couldn't have been said better!! Unfortunately the world will always be full of narrow minded people that feel the need to push their so called "morals" or beliefs onto other people because they chose to do or think different.

Katherine Wyvern said...

Good rant. My kind of rant.

Susan Bloomingdale said...

Keep doing what you do best! Others will either keep up or fizzle out....either way you were there first and most definitely the best!!