Monday, June 11, 2012

Me and Magic Mike

 As you read this post, you may wonder if it’s a paid advertisement. I assure you it’s not, although if the producers of  “Magic Mike” want to compensate me, I won’t say no – as long as I get to determine the form of payment.

So … last night I was nearly asleep when an ad for this amazing movie popped up on TV. In no time I was wide awake, screaming my head off, and wanting to stuff dollar bills in someone’s underwear. Matthew McConnaughey … Channing Tatum … JOE MANGIANELLO … playing MALE STRIPPERS! That amount of masculine hotness ought to be more carefully regulated. Putting them all in the same movie, strutting and stripping for the ladies? Holy G-string, I’m not sure I can take it. 

Let’s start with the “veteran” of the crew. I’ve been lusting after Matthew McConnaughey for years. The man is pure sex-in-a-wink. I don’t even care that he’s married now, I’m just happy he exists on this planet and that he seems to prefer going shirtless. Word has it he designed his own ass-less pants for this movie. Gotta love that man.

Channing Tatum is a more of an up-and-coming sex god, but he’s got major potential. Get him out of Nicholas Sparks mode and he just might break through. Plus, he has real-life experience as a stripper under the name Chan Crawford. In fact, the movie is based on his stripping experiences. Obviously, I need to bump him higher in my Lust List. 

Now for Joe. Joe, Joe, Joe … I don’t know where you’ve been all my life (curse my lack of HBO), but although I’ve never seen you in True Blood, you make my blood sizzle every time I see a photo of you. If I told you just how much I’m looking forward to seeing you play a character named Big Dick Richie, you might be running for a restraining order.

I’m not as familiar with the two other stars, Matt Bomer and Alex Pettyfer, but I’m looking forward to learning more about them --- or at least finding out how they look while they’re taking it all off.

And then, to top if all off, the director of this piece of genius filmmaking is Steven Soderbergh. I find him sexy in a cerebral way. If nothing else, you know the movie is going to be well-directed and well-produced. As long as they don’t skimp on the onstage scenes, I’m going to be one happy fan on June 29th, when “Magic Mike” comes out. Did I mention the date? June 29th. MAGIC MIKE. in theaters everywhere.

As for payment, a private performance for me and all my friends should do it. So how about you? Should I put you on the guest list? Are you looking forward to this movie as much as I am?

Juniper Bell's latest release is BEAUTIFUL OBSESSION. If they ever make a movie of it, she'd nominate Matthew, Channing and Joe for starring roles.


SusieJ said...

Please, please add me to your guest list!! This has been on my "to see" list since I first heard about it. So much hotness in one movie....sigh.
Hugs xx

June M. said...

Please add me to the list! I will be useful, I volunteer to oil them up, measure for costumes, help them get ready for the performance (make sure they are "up" to it, LOL). See, very useful.

PG Forte said...

OMG, HOW have you missed Matt Bomer? He might be my top reason for wanting to see this movie (shh. don't tell Erin that.)

Word has it he's being considered for the lead in the movie version of 50 Shades. Which is a huge conflict of interest for me.

Movie I don't want to see based on a book I don't want to read...but it's starring Matt Bomer? And there's sex?

Yeah...I might just have to see that after all.

Erin Nicholas said...

OMG! I'm SO at this movie!!

Matthew will always be first in my heart (which I suppose leaves Matt B for PG :)) but I'm a fan of Matt Bomer from White Collar. He's SO cute!

Let's all go at the same time and tweet each other!! :)

Alexandra O'Hurley said...

My 16 year old asked me to take her to see it, as she's got a huge crush on Channing Tatum. Not sure how I feel about taking my nearly 17 yr old to this movie. But I AM SO THERE...OMG! When I saw the previews a few weeks ago, I had to pinch myself to ensure it wasn't a dream.

Heather Rainier said...

Oh, Hell yes, Juniper, add me to your list. I'm another of those that doesn't have HBO, but Joe and the others still make me simmer. I think a girl's night out to go see the movie and margaritas afterward fits the bill!;-)

Ursula said...

Oh yes! Definitely put me on the guest list! I have been dying to see this movie since I first heard of it! So many drool worthy men and so little time. *sigh*


Juniper Bell said...

It sounds like it's going to be some party!! I'm all for the margaritas afterwards. Or during.